Da Nang, April 14, 2014
I have so many time now, I am rich at time. And also I have totally freedom but just one thing: I use my parents's money. But I promise it's just temporary.
I love Da Nang. The thing I like the most is Da Nang beach. I can go to beach everyday. Now summer almost comes, so at afternoon the beach is very noisy and full of people, they play some sport like soccer, basketball, gymnastics...After I hang out with my friends Huong, Vu, Hoang. I still wanted to have time alone, so I walked to beach alone. It was a beautiful night at the beach, in the middle of month, moon is almost a circle with the beautiful light.
I walked until I feel better inside me. And I sit alone, contemplate the current moment. Truth be told, I didn't feel worry at all, now is time that I think about myself a lot without any family ties, company ties and social ties. No one forces me to do anything. No one tells me that I need to do something. Therefore like Jon Jandai - a man who gave an extremely brave and wonderful ted talk about "Life is easy" - I just admire him so much, yes, like Jon said that we now don't have freedom because our life is controlled by something else and someone else, it likes a stream that rolls us come to somewhere that we don't really want to go, but because it's a stream and we don't have enough brave to change the stream therefore we lost ourselves in that stream. I am now stopping at this moment, I now have time to observe my stream. I must said that it takes too much time to think about what I really want to do, I am so lucky because I have time to think about it and still have food to eat.
My current situation now is not good at all. It makes me wanna cry at night, but now in the scent of morning, I totally feel happy because what I have is time, a laptop to write down a mess inside me.
If Da Nang does not want to keep me here, I will find my life in somewhere else. I don't know. Let's try.
Recently, I find information about studying abroad. I still keep two dreams, one - I still want to become a good doctor, second - I still want to study abroad.
About the 1st dream, Danh - my friend, he always tells me that working in IT field does not bring any useful things for society, for people needed our help and care. Danh is very good at technology, he has ability to do whatever he wants to do, and after spending time at some company, Danh selects another option, he didn't want to work at IT business. And his dream is just like me, to be a doctor. But it's too late now. I don't know. Danh is working at a small college at Tam Ky city relating to culture and art.
About the 2st dream, it is a dream keep on chasing me since I was a kid until now. It's instead of disappearing following the time I become an adult, it's bigger and bigger following time. I want to study abroad. Really want it.
Now I have free time, just keep calm and take advantage of time.
About Thong, because of me not because of him. I believe so much in our relationship when it began. But now everything is death. I admit it just normal like when the sun must comes down every afternoon. I learn to admit and let it go. I understand why he silents. And therefore because of my respect for my soul, I keep silence too. Just want to say goodbye but I know now it's not necessary at all. He will be fine and me too. But yesterday when I listened to Such Great Heights of Iron and Wine singer, I totally feel hurt inside me when think about our relationship. Somehow I miss him. "Oh, I am missing you to death". And about our kiss, just like the lyrics, "When we kiss it's perfectly align". Just so happy because I have him once in my life. Now I just move on with all my decision.
Be better everyday. I won't vist gmail and check mail anymore. Just learn something I want today.
“Phụ nữ nếu như gặp được đàn ông tốt , thì cả đời sẽ chẳng cần phải trưởng thành nữa. Một người phụ nữ càng mạnh mẽ thành thục, cũng bởi vì cô ấy chưa gặp được người đàn ông tốt .
Mà đàn ông nếu gặp một người phụ nữ tốt, có lẽ cả đời sẽ giống như một cậu bé. Đàn ông cứ mãi không trưởng thành, là bởi vì người phụ nữ bên cạnh họ đã quá tốt rồi …
Có những người vì không có ai bên cạnh chăm sóc, vậy nên mới trở nên mạnh mẽ. Có những người vì được chăm sóc quá chu đáo, nên vĩnh viễn không thể nào trưởng thành được !”
"If a woman meets a good man, so she spends all her life no need to grow up anymore. A woman who is powerful and strong, because she never meets her good man, always in relationship with bad guys.
And also if a man meets a good woman, maybe he is a kid all his life. He never grow up, because the woman besides him is too kind and a caring woman...
People - because they have no one take care of, so they become strong. People - because they are well cared for, so forever they never grow up"
